Frantic.

july12 081I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. +Psalm 16

Do you ever think He feels frantic about us?

Like in the way that I, hanging clothes,

Nathanael Fisher up the hill with his fishing pole casting on the lawn,

The dog running back and forth between us,

catchy Sunday School tunes in the morning air because Nathanael likes

::::::God is so good, God is so good, God is so good, He’s so good to me. He cares for me, He cares for me…

Picking up the basket and telling Him how beautiful this day is::::

no bugs to swat::: yet,

birds tweeting and flittering,

warm Spring all around us,

Gathering the pins and thinking about what to do next and

hoping it was something to keep me outside soaking in the sun and telling Him again how beautiful the sky blue is and I cannot wait to plant purple flowers and I hope I don’t see any ticks and I think I should make something with blueberries for dessert tonight and there is not even a wind and so that keeps the day so warm and should I just leave the basket down by the clothesline instead and maybe I will rake over there, so that…

:::::::::::::::::::::: STOPPPPPP…..

Where’s his singing and talking to himself?

Why isn’t he yelling to me to fix the bobber on his fishing line?

I was just talking to him.

just a second ago.

Where is he?

NATHANAEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Primal screaming from my gut.

Eight million more things on a hot, one-track pulse through my mind and none of them have to do with blueberries and flowers and clothespins……

Frantic like that.

Racing.feet.

Racing.heart.

Racing.mind.

Where is he??????????

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I right here, Mama.

Why didn’t you answer me?

Where did you go?

I couldn’t hear you singing.

I couldn’t see you over there.

I love you. Come here.

now.please.

And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. +Luke 15

I love you…….

Frantic where are you.

Frantic pulling you close.

Frantic let me look at your face.

Frantic answer me when I call you.

Frantic you are mine and I love you.

When my mind is reeling.

When I settle deep in the muddy waters of self.

::::self.

:::::::::::::::::::::self.

When I cast my thoughts somewhere far enough away to teeter on the rocky bank just long enough to catch myself or fall right into the mucky murk that gets sticky on the way out…

When we are absent like that?

Does He say that to us?

Where are you?

I was just talking to you.

I can’t see you.

You are mine, but I can’t find you right now.

But is He father-frantic, like that?

And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day… “Where are you?”  +Genesis 3

Or does He always know?

Right where we are.

For the Lord sees not as man sees… +1Samuel 16

Or is He always with us?

Right where we are.

And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age. +Matthew 28

Or is He never frantic, but full of love- passion?

For us? To meander back?

Even if just a moment has lapsed?

To run back?

Even if just a moment has lapsed?

… son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours… +Luke 15

Waiting for us, each day, each moment, each second, so that WE are

ourselves…

never frantic?

What is His frantic?

passion.

His calling us?

love.

His drawing us in?

peace.

You keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is set on You… +Isaiah 26

He is always, always right where we are.

Frantically searches for us?

He passionately waits for us.

But

our frantic seeking Him–

when the water gets too deep and we are casting our line lonely into this world-sea of unknown?                                             ::::: faith:::::

Answered by Him.

Peace to you! … Why are you troubled, and why do doubts arise in your hearts? See My hands and My feet, that it is I Myself. Touch Me and see… +Luke 24

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