These photos.

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Photos lately.

So many of them.

Things keep surprising me and I keep the camera close.

The sky with the passing cloud. The cloud heavy with the rain. The rain dripping on the leaf. The leaf attached to the stem. The stem holding the flower. The flower grabbed by the boy. The boy chasing his sister. His sister smiling at the father. And the father looking at the wife. And the wife wanting to inhale all the thanks and exhale the joy.Deep.Wide.and lovely.

::::::::::::::: even on the hard days. yes.

And all of these pictures seem silly. Like go do something else more worth- it. Like go wash a dish. Like go read a book. Like go hang a towel. Like go fold a towel.

What have I been doing? Taking a picture of that towel instead.

And then thanking God for it.

:::::::::::::::::::Yes, even for the towel.

How He picked the dots silver on the moth wing and how He breathed breeze on the dawn grass glittered swaying with dew and how He furled the fern on the stream running sweet ripples and how He placed each curly hair on his little head so they drip on his brow just right and how He created her smile making her lashes dance and how He gave me

this husband:::

The husband who meets my am-I-taking-too-many-pictures-here look and steals away my camera while I cook

::::::and picks me a rose just bloomed today because I love the vintage smell I cannot explain: just feels like home:

:and he kisses my cheek and unveils the camera from his shirt::::

:::: a picture-kiss of this rosebud:::

:: because he knows I wonder:::

::::if I take too much time with the joy-thanks magnified?

::: thanks kept fresh by the shutter closing still on the moment.

And he showed me his photo.

his gift to me tonight.

::::::::::::: His gift to me…………..

To settle me. Pete’s I-like-that-you-like-this-picture-thing-I-think-it’s-pretty-great- offering of love to me.

Because among our laughter at a song off-key and our chasing around with the hose and the planting of the pretty flowers not all moments are perfect. Like any day. And we had a sharp glance when we misunderstood and we had a word when we were sweating in the sun with rakes and wheelbarrows and kids buzzing and bugs buzzing and needing a fresh drink of water.

                      ::::::::::::::::::::of living water.

That Living Water that spilled over the soil and breathed life into the plants and the animals and streams and clouds, the roses, too::::

All exhaling praise to He who swept sedges across the marshes, He who filled glens with violets and valleys with rivers, He who breathed life into mountains groan-rising out of earth, He who fanned wind across the desert:::::

He who gifted this all-to-His-glory Earth to us to enjoy and savor and taste and see and breathe

:::::::::::::::::::::::: thankful praise out in all things.

And when I take these pictures::::

When I see His love amplified deep in the raindrop dripping praise to Him,

I cannot help but take another.

:::: and when a day gets long and a cloud comes dark,

I can see the love He intends for us when I look through this lense::: this lense of thanksgiving.

112

Creation was made for this! Drench the plowed fields, soak the dirt clods With rainfall as harrow and rake bring her to blossom and fruit. Snow-crown the peaks with splendor, scatter rose petals down your paths, All through the wild meadows, rose petals. Set the hills to dancing, Dress the canyon walls with live sheep, a drape of flax across the valleys. Let them shout, and shout, and shout! Oh, oh, let them sing!

Psalm 65 MSG (biblegateway)

Rest in the hallway

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The thought lodged in my heart in my strong place this morning.

Today, my strong place came in the middle of my dim hallway, lugging a load of laundry, being followed by a boy dressed as a knight in Narnia looking for Aslan and a cat-lion nipping at my heels waiting to be fed.

My strong place.

When I see clearly, like it is the first time I open my eyes and breath in light and catch my deep breath.

A strong place arrives in the clarity of Him.

Strong strength.

His strong strength that swallows me in love while simultaneously swallowing my fear like it has no place to nestle in His arms anywhere near me.

Because His arms are enough and His roar diminishes worry and His sheep fall down grazing on His grace and glorifying His mighty-King name.

Where does worry have room there?

:::::::::::::::::::::::::: the beauty of His mercy on us.

… weep no more; behold, the Lion… has conquered… +Revelation 5:5

It came to me in that hallway, while waiting to open the next door to rid myself of the heavy load of…

:::::: laundry?

The thought, so simple, so piercing, so stopping and peace-filling:::

I have what I need for right now.

In this place. In the hallway. While I wait. While I open doors. While I close doors. While I breathe.

I have what I need for right now.

Because He says so.

Simply:::

because He says so.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::if I believe… In my strong place and in my weak place and in my hallways.

The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe. +Proverbs 18:10

Today, I have what I need.

Today, the world spins and distractions slobber ugly teeth before my eyes

and in my ears

and through my mind…

And I breathe shallow and I break slow…

Until I break :::::::on my knees

and I whisper-exhale::: Yahweh.

Strong strength in a name like that One.

Yahweh-shammah: “God is there.”                            (+Ezekiel 48:35)

God is there.

In my moment right now.

In my yesterday.

In my tomorrow.

In my

Forever.

And I rest.

In knowing. In the believing?

::::::yes, in the believing.

The Lamb slain for us.

::::::::::::::::::::::: deepest love.

The Lion who conquered.

:::::::::::::::::::::::: fiercest love.

A worship-whisper that spills us free:

Yahweh-shammah.

Rest.

He is already there.

One year ago this week.

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I taught at a beautiful school next to a lake, the native word for lake: kuspem… where on most days I watched the latter part of the sun rise over the water. 
 
In the Fall, as school was just beginning, I could peer down at the blue of the water and up at the blue of the sky and see the trees dotted with reds and oranges as the rays broke over a new morning. 
 
In the Winter, it would be common to see a moose or a deer walking on the ice as a yellow glow sparkled over the snow rising from behind the hill and filling the day with His beauty.
 
In the Spring, as the Winter broke its hold on the Point, the mist would rise dramatically and forcefully off the water and ice like a prism and the shining pink and orange of the sun would bounce and reflect and take my breath away.
 
As Spring turned to Summer-like weather, the loons would sing a Morning Has Broken song and I would drive by the fisherman on the lake– all the while anticipating the end of the school year thinking of my babies at home and ice cream and flip flops and swimming… things I knew were just around the corner, until I ventured back to this place on the lake and the bright eyes of my students…
 
And then there was yesterday.
 
Yesterday. When I drove my last day down the school lane and I, for a moment felt broken and weak in myself as I stopped next to the glory of the sun as it peeked over the water– sprinkled with glittery light on a calm day that felt tumultuous in me.
 
As the Lord gave me another sunrise to enjoy on my last day of thirteen years at Motahkmiqewi Skulhawossol…
 
 …and on my first day of new beginnings.
 
I wept.
 
Not uncommon for me these days as I grieve closing this chapter and stepping into the unknown as I turn the page on what He has for me.
 
I said to them,
as they served me cake,
gave me a beautiful sweetgrass basket,
hugged me,
served me lobster in the evening,
 
sang “You Are My Sunshine” to me, so silly and loving,
 
but so wonderfully blessed I felt…
 
I said to them,
through my tears, as I told them thank you for this moment of many years:
 
“This. 
This is who I was, you all know.
I was this,
Before I was a wife to my Love,
Before I was a mother to my Little Loves,
 
I was this.
A teacher to your children.
I have been blessed.”
 
And I sat down and they hugged and spoke friend-love words in my ear.
 
And I was by myself at the end of it, carrying my last box and closing the trunk and He who carries me spoke His soft, powerful, voice in my ear, too.
 
Because I yearn, I pray, I desire to listen to that Voice:
 
He said::
 
“Listen to Me.  Before all of this.
 
You were a child of MINE.”
 
:::::::::::smile.
Thank You, Father.
:::::::::I am Yours. Lead on.

Finding where I’m Founded.

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… that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. +Matthew 7:24

Everything can move.

all over the place, if that’s the way it should be.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: if that’s what He wants.

This part over here and this thing finally over with…

while this thing gets started and this little bit that was over here…

can be moved right over there.

Every last piece of it all…

Just

Jumble around.

Upside down and back again.

Back and forth.

Something new.

Something old that is new again.

Move around.

All of the stuff.

the jobs.

the people.

the things.

the opinions.

the weights.

the day and the night.

the glad and the sorrow.

the open and the closed.

the here now, the gone tomorrow.

One step up.

One step down.

This thing before that thing

that happened to be first before.

and now it is not.

Something  in place and cozy for a long time.

Uprooted and planted somewhere else.

Where it grows stronger now.

Or put where it was always supposed to be and

….find it just took awhile to move there.

It can all shift around.

A little risk, a little trust, all bundled up and tried out tied up…

packaged sweetly in belief.

belief.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::aye, there’s the rub

                                 I believe! Help my unbelief! +Mark 9:24.

It all can move, walk around and breathe somewhere else.

Where it was supposed to be anyway

but maybe a little out of place…

….when I was busy building my own…

…my own…

…kingdom…

When I could have been standing on the Rock just letting Him align all my little pebbles in my row.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::His row.

Don’t you breathe easier when things are in their rightful place?

Me too.

Oh, but the thing that cannot move.

That WILL NOT move.

:::::::::::::::::::thankful.

The thing that is sure and life-filled and breathing and vibrant and close and kept-solid and never breaks in the wind and does not dry and wither and sticks- immoveable and boasts- constant and fills up and pours out and never depletes.

That sure thing.

Sure.

Built.

Built sure.

Built up sure.

On a foundation.

On the Foundation.

                                But God’s firm foundation stands… +2 Timothy 2:19a

somewhere founded.

established and true.

And true…

True.

The One true.

Everything can shift and bend and find-new and lose-old and move and change and journey away…

and run back…

:::::::prodigal.

to a living, breathing-sure thing that fills up and cannot help but pour out…

…this life…

founded…

on the Rock.

The unchangeable.

The immoveable.

The mighty.

The steady.

Let it all change.

Let it reform and temper and sway and evolve and transform and diverge and diversify…

All of it.

All of it can change.

all of it.

It’s all for the good.

Founded.

On the Rock.

of Ages.

….cleft for me,

let me hide myself in Thee….